Matressy Science Theatre 3000 ----------------------------- $dotat: doc/web/writing/futon,v 1.2 2001/12/17 15:15:29 fanf Exp $ It had been a magnificent evening. By turns hilarious, provoking, emotional, the authentic performance of the actors had deeply moved the audience. The people stood up straight from their places with applause, as the curtain fell and rose again to reveal the whole cast who bowed deep, enjoying the adulation. But this was not enough for the crowd, who left their seats, eager to get closer to the stars on stage. Too impatient to shuffle sideways to the aisles, some even climbed over the seats in front, oblivious of any loss of dignity. But this was less of a worry to those on the balconies above, who went as far as to throw themselves over the edge onto the backs of the richer theatre-goers below. They had litle to worry about, since they were young with strong seams, risking little more than a strained, or at worse a burst, stitch. However, their exubernce caused some casualties amongst the richer, more well-known and elderly clientele below, scattering shocking cotton gore around the stalls. The newspapers the next day were full of the pictures: much-loved celebrities with broken, missing buttons; young bucks covered in fluff; distinguished businessfutons looking trampled and flat. Demands were made by the popular press: Fix the balconies in theatres! Never again must mattresskind be allowed to be devastated by such carnage! And so, even though divans still told their offspring to be like the beautifully soft feather beds that allowed a princess to feel a pea through a great pile of bedding, they worried more that their dear duvets would end up unsewn before their time, overstuffed and overused, ending up as mere sheets for anyone to stain and discard.